an act of optimism

'So you're an artist as well' he writes. 'Do being an artist and optimism go together?'

No, no, no: no they bloody don't! I want to write. I'm a misery, a worrier, a waker in the night, a panicker in broad daylight. My email address, my username, my blog title - misnomers all. Don't be taken in by my cheerful exterior: beneath it beats a heart gripped by terror. Don't find out about me, don't let me in, because if cheerful is what you are looking for then mister, you are going to be deeply disappointed. Move along, move right along now.

'I would say I'm a pragmatist' I write back. 'I'm regarded as cheerful by my friends'.

Perhaps there is a scintilla of optimism in me after all.