I am the beat

When I stood in front of a mirror this lunchtime I realised that at some point in the last few weeks I have morphed into a middle-aged mod. When and how did this happen, and why did no-one let me know?

I tried to go dancing last night: I honestly did. I really felt like going, and lord knows I need the exercise. I got as far as finding suitable clothes and doing make up and putting on my dance shoes but sat in front of Ashes-to-Ashes (the show with the irritating and Wrong All Wrong bra strap) I lost the will to actually leave the house. It was OK though: I ate two pieces of gingerbread cake instead which is the same as going out and getting some exercise, isn't it?

The gingerbread is bloody delicious, by the way. I thoroughly recommend Nigella's recipe.