Inertia

I had big plans for today. I was going to do loads of stuff, but I got sidetracked by cups of tea and my reload button.

There's always tomorrow.

Effort

I woke up late.

That's all, so far.

Humdrum

I have been invited to blog here while Cheerful One is away.

I do not know what to say.

your turn: view board

I am coming to the conclusion that I am actually quite scared of being creative. I will do almost anything (and with Facebook, one needs hardly anything at all) to avoid taking one of my many ideas and turning them into something which might conceivably be A Bit Shit.

More scrabble, perhaps....do the windows need cleaning? I ought to put some socks on, I think I'll just do some gardening. I'm going to the shops to buy a pen/a pair of shoes/some plants/a book/bedroom furniture. I need a nap! I am going to re-arrange my finances, ring the plumber, get loft insulation: Oh Look! Another ancient friend on Facebook. Hurrah!: it's my turn in scrabble. Oh; it's not my turn I'll challenge someone else to another game of scrabble. Cup of coffee would be nice, and then maybe I'll hoover then make some soup then fill rubble bags then have a bath then I urgently must look up the feminine of the word 'maestro' and gosh YouTube MySpaz Bloglines Facebook Facebook Blogger Facebook Gmail Facebook I fancy a drink really it's time for bed.

No. Really. Now. RIGHT NOW.

In a minute.

days when I ain't spotty

tablecloth
Originally uploaded by etcher67

1. The Rite of Spring. Monster guiros, Batman!
2. Leffe. I really like Leffe. Yes I do. Really.
3. Nigel Slater's August 14th. Good grief: unfeasably delicious.
4. Zatoichi.
5. Wellies! A bargain at £9.99. No, they aren't flowery.
6. Blackberry picking (in wellies).
7. Shortbread baking (also in wellies, as it happens).
8. Freecycle. I have freecycled away my old chest of drawers, as well as some curtains and a bird table. Freecycle is marvellous.

a million to one, they say...

bus stop alien 2
Originally uploaded by etcher67

Whilst on the number 48 bus the other day from London Bridge to Hackney imagine my excitement when I spotted something which I read about months ago - the bus stop aliens!

Formed from potatoes with a variety of stickish things poked into them they rest on the tops of bus stops on Shoreditch High Street. I'm not sure whether they have any deeper meaning (are the potato farmers protesting, I wonder? ), or whether they are just plain silly, but they were a joy to behold. Potato artist - I salute you!

without a dream in my heart

cheese!
Originally uploaded by etcher67

I have made cheese! It was terribly easy, and involved only a pint of whole milk, a stocking and some lemon juice. Next I am going to get some spinach and cook it with the cheese to make Sag Paneer.

It's all gone a bit Country Living around here, what with the cheese making and the gardening. I am currently waiting impatiently for the purple sprouting broccoli plants to arrive in the garden centre, as it is my favourite vegetable of all time, ever (closely followed by buttered cabbage) and now is the time to plant it. Added to this the calendula seeds have come up, which is inordinately exciting. I expect the snails will be thrilled, too. I did some research the other day to find out whether it is possible to eat our native garden snails, as I have an over abundance of them; and I am partial to a snail or six in a French restaurant. However, having read through the process of 'purging' and cooking them, I came to the conclusion that I couldn't go through with it. I hadn't realised I was so squeamish; but for now I think I'll stick with mushrooms and garlic butter, as the taste is broadly similar and you don't have to keep them in a bucket for 5 days before you tuck in.

I really must get some wellies.

staying out of chokey

the evil tree gets it
Originally uploaded by etcher67

1) A nice long walk in the sun at 8.30 (No, really: surprisingly pleasant to be up and mobile at that hour).
2) Friendly chaps removing Ugly Fir Trees and rubble. At one point six burly blokes in the back garden. Is this a record?
3) The prospect of a Lovely Plum Tree to replace Ugly Fir Tree.
4) Laying on the bed asleep with my face in the sun. My new favourite mid-afternoon game.
5) The anticipation of a cold glass of wine with salmon marinaded in olive oil lemon and mint, accompanied by beans and courgettes from the garden. Yum!

two fat fast ones click, click, click

smasher
Originally uploaded by etcher67

My new best friend is called Smasher. Smasher is working on a small project at the moment entitled 'Kill the evil concrete monstrosity'. Smasher is a bit slow, because a) there's a lot of concrete and it's monstrous, b) there is also a lot of soil, which Smasher refuses to move so I have to do it, and c) the concrete is heavy and requires moving out of the way which I also have to do. Project 'Kill the evil concrete monstrosity' involves a lot of sitting down, I am finding. Too bad Smasher doesn't have a life of his own, although that might lead to a 'Magician's Apprentice' scenario which would be just plain scary.

Smasher also has his eyes on other areas, such as Facebook and this blog, but so far I have managed to convince him that they are virtual and therefore unsmashable.

a bit of slap and tickle

fountain
Originally uploaded by etcher67

1. Sausage egg and chips with gossip. Two sorts of food.
2. Barbecued bananas. Stick them on the dying barbecue in their skins until they are black, and then eat them with Co-Op chocolate ice cream. Sit back and await your diabetic coma. Mmmmyum.
3. A lot of lying down. Not inactivity, because of conversations. Just stimulating intellectual discourse without standing up.
4. Furniture! No longer languishing in the boot of my car, but indoors and up the stairs, with the minimum of fuss and back damage.
5. A fountain. Never a bad thing in the hot heat.
6. Seeing exhibitions.

snail: wiggle r index finger like a worm*

I had my third and final level 2 sign language exam today. I had to have a conversation with my sign-language tutor about 'what I usually do for my holidays'. This is surprisingly reminiscent of those awful essays teachers set children on their return to school (let's not think about that too hard), but was distinctly more inspiring than the alternatives 'car breakdown' or 'a camping holiday'.

My usual technique with exams is to pretend that they aren't happening for as long as humanly possible, and then to go through about a week of feeling stupendously nervous whenever I remember that they are. I knew this one was preying on my mind when I woke up the other morning in the middle of a dream about what my conversation might be. Actually, I was quite impressed that I could dream in sign language, and it felt as though I was getting some subconscious practise in, too. I knew I'd reached my tipping point when I spent five minutes swearing out loud last Tuesday at a prom (not during the performance, obviously).

This morning I finally caved in and spent the day doing actual practise, not just thinking (although I maintain that thinking counts). As a consequence of the need to practise I also got the back lawn mowed, did the washing up, changed my utilities tariff (I'm all green now baby), contemplated solar panels (can't really afford them at the moment), arranged a quote for loft insulation and went through several drawers to clear out clothing I no longer wear. This was interspersed with actually thinking about the exam, writing likely conversational topics down (I knew it was about holidays), looking up signs on the internet in a slightly panicky fashion (no easy task when the best online dictionaries boast 'nearly 500 words!'), muttering under my breath a lot and even doing the occasional sign. I knew I'd reached the point of 'too nervous to practise' when I could no longer spell 'France' on my piece of paper. When I got to the classroom for my exam I couldn't work the pen to sign my name either, which given that it was a normal biro was a slightly comical moment.

Anyway, now it's done; I've got through the sticky patch of not quite knowing the signs for 'snail' or 'fountain', and being completely unable to remember the simple sign for 'never'. At one point my conversation did feel like an actual conversation, which I hope is a good sign. I have to wait eight weeks for the result, and it's been proper hard; so I may well not pass. My tutor wants me to start level 3 in September, and having spent over a year moaning about going to class every Thursday night, and swearing that I won't go on to the next level, obviously now I'm tempted. Fickle: my middle name.

* No shell! What's that all about? It's a bloody slug: no wonder I couldn't remember it...

can't you see how happy we could be

tea for three
Originally uploaded by etcher67

1) The smell of ripe melon.
2) Actual compost in my compost bin.
3) Peace and quiet.
4) Sunshine!

I give up. I am going to eat the melon.